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visualjyushiI got waaay too busy to do this for 2025, but I want to actually attempt it in the coming year :)
visualjyushi
valzhangI finished reading Kafka's collection last night. None of them measured up to the Metamorphosis—no wonder it's his most famous work—but I still enjoyed all of them greatly, some more than others. Since they're all short stories and poem collections, I'll just do them all in one post. (Especially before I get too sucked into Bret Easton Ellis' The Shards and ostensibly forget about every other piece of literature I've ever read.)
Contemplation: I felt a little frustrated at first because this collection lacks pretty much any kind of story or narrative. Once I began looking at it as just poems I liked them a lot more. It's a nice way to appreciate Kafka's writing style; they feel imaginative and observant, as if you're presented with a world as it is. I especially like 'The Businessman' and 'Being Unhappy'. That being said, I really do prefer his stories over his poems. 7/10.
the Judgment: This one is such an interesting look at a father-son dynamic and only gets more crazy to think about in regards to Kafka's own relationship with his father. While a lot of his works are in some sense very autobiographical this one feels the most direct, the most intrusive. There are probably other things about this book that people more intelligent than me can derive, like its concept of judgment, but definitely what I liked most was just the window into a complicated parental relationship. It feels very real that a son who takes care of his father and seems like a perfectly good man is endlessly criticized by said father, and in the end submits himself to that 'judgment'. 7.5/10.
the Stoker: I feel... as if I'm not allowed to rate this yet. It's just one chapter of the unfinished novel Amerika, sadly not in the book but which I definitely plan on reading because I did like this one as well. The titular stoker is a very Kafkaesque character, downtrodden, mistreated, ignored by everybody, even if Karl is the protagonist. And the characters were fun. Again I did like this but I don't want to say anything about it definitely before I read Amerika.
In the Penal Colony: I loved this one, my second favourite work in the whole book. It's so gruesome but it doesn't feel scary (and Kafka is well capable of writing horror), it just feels very fascinating and almost dreamy. I know most people interpret this one religiously but I appreciate the dichotomy of tradition/modernity in itself and I think it's one of those things that will always feel relevant. The character of the officer seems to me almost romantic, the epitome of the old world loyalist, surrendering himself to his own worshipped style of execution when he failed to convince the dignitary just as a soldier kills himself when he knows a war has been lost (even if he didn't get to have it in the end). I don't know, but it just really resonated with me. Also the subplot of the condemned man and the soldier becoming friends was funny as hell. 9/10!
A Country Doctor (collection): A little similar to Contemplation in nature, though certainly with a more understandable flow of events, veering more toward 'story' territory than poems. Though some of them are equally as nonsensical and bizarre. There were some I didn't care for but some I found really interesting, and I think it would be different for everybody.
The story the collection derives its title from, A Country Doctor, made no sense to me at all. I had to search it up to see what other people thought (something I hate doing before I've come to an opinion myself). But I was glad to see everyone else is as confused as I am xD. I think there's a lot to be said about doctors and expectations, I suppose. But mostly I just think the vibe of the story is so haunting. This is definitely the one that creeped me out the most.
Other stories I liked from here are 'An Old Journal' and 'Before the Law'. Overall, 7.5/10.
A Hunger Artist (collection): All of the ones in here are good, but my definite favourite was the story A Hunger Artist itself. Another one of Kafka's more famous works and I understand why. It's very revealing how he thought of himself and what he saw as his dying art—literature—and perhaps how he devoted himself to it to the point of ascetism and religion almost. Josefine is also about an artist's relationship to art and audience but I found it less compelling.
First Sorrow may also seem to be about artist and art, though a rather unconventional one (a trapeze artist). I wonder if it's about the changing whims of artists and how much they seem to fear mundanity, or strive for originality, another higher level of their craft. Or maybe I'm reaching. Never know with these to be honest.
Again, I liked all of them. Like I said, I love the stories more than his shorter stuff, so this gets an 8/10 from me.
There were three other stories in the appendix. Two of them were okay (Great Noise and The Coal-Scuttle Rider) but the other is the one work I straight-up disliked (Aeroplanes in Brescia). I could not bring myself to like it. Even the dreamy characteristic writing style of Kafka does not come through in that one, it's painfully literal which is not something I enjoyed at all. I think my eyes glazed over reading it.
Other than that! I had a great time reading this collection. I do think the experience is a hundred times enriched if you go through the trouble of learning a bit about Kafka and his personal life, since so many of these stories seem more intimate that way. But the uniqueness and creativity are distinct in both writing style and in the stories and character themselves; it left me with the strong feeling of Oh, I understand now why people call things 'Kafkaesque'. It's just such a... peculiar type of vibe. I really liked it.
I'll be honest, when it comes to reading, I usually appreciate a directness and logic. So these works, in all their bizarreness, were a little challenging for me, but not in a bad way. They really forced me to slow down and think, and God knows I probably don't do that enough.
Overall, a strong 8.5/10.
Contemplation: I felt a little frustrated at first because this collection lacks pretty much any kind of story or narrative. Once I began looking at it as just poems I liked them a lot more. It's a nice way to appreciate Kafka's writing style; they feel imaginative and observant, as if you're presented with a world as it is. I especially like 'The Businessman' and 'Being Unhappy'. That being said, I really do prefer his stories over his poems. 7/10.
the Judgment: This one is such an interesting look at a father-son dynamic and only gets more crazy to think about in regards to Kafka's own relationship with his father. While a lot of his works are in some sense very autobiographical this one feels the most direct, the most intrusive. There are probably other things about this book that people more intelligent than me can derive, like its concept of judgment, but definitely what I liked most was just the window into a complicated parental relationship. It feels very real that a son who takes care of his father and seems like a perfectly good man is endlessly criticized by said father, and in the end submits himself to that 'judgment'. 7.5/10.
the Stoker: I feel... as if I'm not allowed to rate this yet. It's just one chapter of the unfinished novel Amerika, sadly not in the book but which I definitely plan on reading because I did like this one as well. The titular stoker is a very Kafkaesque character, downtrodden, mistreated, ignored by everybody, even if Karl is the protagonist. And the characters were fun. Again I did like this but I don't want to say anything about it definitely before I read Amerika.
In the Penal Colony: I loved this one, my second favourite work in the whole book. It's so gruesome but it doesn't feel scary (and Kafka is well capable of writing horror), it just feels very fascinating and almost dreamy. I know most people interpret this one religiously but I appreciate the dichotomy of tradition/modernity in itself and I think it's one of those things that will always feel relevant. The character of the officer seems to me almost romantic, the epitome of the old world loyalist, surrendering himself to his own worshipped style of execution when he failed to convince the dignitary just as a soldier kills himself when he knows a war has been lost (even if he didn't get to have it in the end). I don't know, but it just really resonated with me. Also the subplot of the condemned man and the soldier becoming friends was funny as hell. 9/10!
"How we watched the transfiguration in the tormented faces, how we held our cheeks in the glow of this arduously achieved and already passing justice! I tell you, comrade, those were times!"
A Country Doctor (collection): A little similar to Contemplation in nature, though certainly with a more understandable flow of events, veering more toward 'story' territory than poems. Though some of them are equally as nonsensical and bizarre. There were some I didn't care for but some I found really interesting, and I think it would be different for everybody.
The story the collection derives its title from, A Country Doctor, made no sense to me at all. I had to search it up to see what other people thought (something I hate doing before I've come to an opinion myself). But I was glad to see everyone else is as confused as I am xD. I think there's a lot to be said about doctors and expectations, I suppose. But mostly I just think the vibe of the story is so haunting. This is definitely the one that creeped me out the most.
Other stories I liked from here are 'An Old Journal' and 'Before the Law'. Overall, 7.5/10.
A Hunger Artist (collection): All of the ones in here are good, but my definite favourite was the story A Hunger Artist itself. Another one of Kafka's more famous works and I understand why. It's very revealing how he thought of himself and what he saw as his dying art—literature—and perhaps how he devoted himself to it to the point of ascetism and religion almost. Josefine is also about an artist's relationship to art and audience but I found it less compelling.
First Sorrow may also seem to be about artist and art, though a rather unconventional one (a trapeze artist). I wonder if it's about the changing whims of artists and how much they seem to fear mundanity, or strive for originality, another higher level of their craft. Or maybe I'm reaching. Never know with these to be honest.
Again, I liked all of them. Like I said, I love the stories more than his shorter stuff, so this gets an 8/10 from me.
There were three other stories in the appendix. Two of them were okay (Great Noise and The Coal-Scuttle Rider) but the other is the one work I straight-up disliked (Aeroplanes in Brescia). I could not bring myself to like it. Even the dreamy characteristic writing style of Kafka does not come through in that one, it's painfully literal which is not something I enjoyed at all. I think my eyes glazed over reading it.
Other than that! I had a great time reading this collection. I do think the experience is a hundred times enriched if you go through the trouble of learning a bit about Kafka and his personal life, since so many of these stories seem more intimate that way. But the uniqueness and creativity are distinct in both writing style and in the stories and character themselves; it left me with the strong feeling of Oh, I understand now why people call things 'Kafkaesque'. It's just such a... peculiar type of vibe. I really liked it.
I'll be honest, when it comes to reading, I usually appreciate a directness and logic. So these works, in all their bizarreness, were a little challenging for me, but not in a bad way. They really forced me to slow down and think, and God knows I probably don't do that enough.
Overall, a strong 8.5/10.
"'Am I supposed to be happy with that as an apology? I suppose it's all I'm going to get. I always have to take what I'm given. I came into the world with a lovely wound; that was my entire outfitting.'
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elian_panatomicpublishingI wanted to post something in honour of Buddie getting to 50k fics on Ao3, so I had a look through my WIPs and polished off this fic that I started writing... in May 2024. I have a plan for what I want to happen next, but I'm really not a longfic writer so the chances of actually continuing it are pretty low. And I didn't even get to the Buddie part of it! Oh well, here it is anyway:
Title: slate blue earth below
Warnings: Past Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts
Summary: Buck gives therapy with his parents another go in the lead up to Maddie and Chim's wedding.
It... doesn't go well.
Title: slate blue earth below
Warnings: Past Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts
Summary: Buck gives therapy with his parents another go in the lead up to Maddie and Chim's wedding.
It... doesn't go well.
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elian_panatomicpublishingLike a lot of people, I've recently become obsessed with Heated Rivalry and I want to try my hand at some fic. To that end I've got a bingo card from the Heated Rivalry Bingo!
If you want your own bingo card you can get one here, and read the FAQ here.
I've been in a pretty major writing slump this year, so hopefully this'll prompt me to actually put pen to paper.
If you want your own bingo card you can get one here, and read the FAQ here.
I've been in a pretty major writing slump this year, so hopefully this'll prompt me to actually put pen to paper.
lemoriHome from con. It was a very long and very cold weekend, but I would count it as a resounding success. Friday was for window shopping, especially seeing as I could barely move my head in the ways I am used to without the beads of my mianguan slapping my eyeballs. I only brought the one cosplay with me this time, but it was a hit even among people who had no idea who I was. Similar to when I cosplay Hua Cheng, second place is reserved for enthusiastic people who know me, but first is somehow always older men and the Shonen Guys. One can immediately be elevated to bro status so long as you're shiny and aura farming (I recently learned this term and enjoy it very much lol). It happens with fascinating consistency. This is not a complaint and they're also always very kind and excited, it just makes me laugh a little.
We were joined by a (very beautiful) woman cosplaying Sukuna during a rest period that day, and at some point I expressed being anxious about paneling for the first time. She asked me if I was nervous that no one would show up, or that too many people would show up... I realized that I had no idea, hahaha. Both were somewhat unsettling in their own ways, but as with many things, I was worried over nothing and everything went really well. The presentation was a good length, and people seemed actually engaged and even came to me for questions and conversation afterwards. I don't think I am particularly funny, but it was a really gratifying feeling to make people laugh, too. We're applying to host a few other panels at another event in April; if someone reattends, I hope to hear that I was convincing enough for them to pick up a certain title... Weheheh.
Speaking of, there was a solitary Cezhou keychain being sold, which marked my very first time ever seeing them at a convention. Imagine my delight. Even more surprising was QQGK and C2P keychains, neither of which I have ever met anyone in person who has ever even read them, let alone made merch for them. It was very difficult being normal and restrained while purchasing, but I managed hahaha. I think there has to be someone out there I can talk to about these things one day.
In the end, it is always a little jarring returning to everyday life after a really eventful weekend, though. I knew that I was going to crash as soon as I got home, but I didn't expect for it to last two days... I feel like I've wasted a lot of time, but I guess it's not really my fault. A retry tomorrow, I suppose.
(Also, it's not at all that important, but I lost my 256 day reading streak along the way and I am actually rather bummed about it LOL. I know it's no big deal, really... but damn hahaha).
We were joined by a (very beautiful) woman cosplaying Sukuna during a rest period that day, and at some point I expressed being anxious about paneling for the first time. She asked me if I was nervous that no one would show up, or that too many people would show up... I realized that I had no idea, hahaha. Both were somewhat unsettling in their own ways, but as with many things, I was worried over nothing and everything went really well. The presentation was a good length, and people seemed actually engaged and even came to me for questions and conversation afterwards. I don't think I am particularly funny, but it was a really gratifying feeling to make people laugh, too. We're applying to host a few other panels at another event in April; if someone reattends, I hope to hear that I was convincing enough for them to pick up a certain title... Weheheh.
Speaking of, there was a solitary Cezhou keychain being sold, which marked my very first time ever seeing them at a convention. Imagine my delight. Even more surprising was QQGK and C2P keychains, neither of which I have ever met anyone in person who has ever even read them, let alone made merch for them. It was very difficult being normal and restrained while purchasing, but I managed hahaha. I think there has to be someone out there I can talk to about these things one day.
In the end, it is always a little jarring returning to everyday life after a really eventful weekend, though. I knew that I was going to crash as soon as I got home, but I didn't expect for it to last two days... I feel like I've wasted a lot of time, but I guess it's not really my fault. A retry tomorrow, I suppose.
(Also, it's not at all that important, but I lost my 256 day reading streak along the way and I am actually rather bummed about it LOL. I know it's no big deal, really... but damn hahaha).
Tags:
luvcrumbsshowing my otp
eli clark x luchino diruse 🧪🔮🦎
from identity v.
obsessed with them since 2022!! my works are mainly focused on them.
canonically met each other, both part of the manor game 6-B.
i love all depictions of them, from the fluffliest nerds in love with a slow burn romance to doomed, tragic lovers to the most gruesome and unhealthy pair who'd ruin the others life <3 they are just so fun to play with !!
aside from the canon game, i have many skin pairings such as surveyor/emergency transport, poisonfeather/horrendous, spring heated wine/unyielding devotion, etc! all of them with their one stories--
aaaand i've created mutiple AU's, being my favorite one my library AU (the first fanfic i ever wrote!)
i switch them around, with some top/bottom preferences for certain pairings but nothing serious.
so yeah!! these are the guys many of my posts will be about. i've been trying to get more people into them and it has worked so far so! i won't stop talking about them in a long time.
links:
check the daily account on twitter.
check the ship playlist.
check the ao3 tag! seer/professor and seer/evil reptilian.
eli clark x luchino diruse 🧪🔮🦎
from identity v.
obsessed with them since 2022!! my works are mainly focused on them.
canonically met each other, both part of the manor game 6-B.
i love all depictions of them, from the fluffliest nerds in love with a slow burn romance to doomed, tragic lovers to the most gruesome and unhealthy pair who'd ruin the others life <3 they are just so fun to play with !!
aside from the canon game, i have many skin pairings such as surveyor/emergency transport, poisonfeather/horrendous, spring heated wine/unyielding devotion, etc! all of them with their one stories--
aaaand i've created mutiple AU's, being my favorite one my library AU (the first fanfic i ever wrote!)
i switch them around, with some top/bottom preferences for certain pairings but nothing serious.
so yeah!! these are the guys many of my posts will be about. i've been trying to get more people into them and it has worked so far so! i won't stop talking about them in a long time.
links:
check the daily account on twitter.
check the ship playlist.
check the ao3 tag! seer/professor and seer/evil reptilian.
Tags:
ashkittyOn to Day 4!
It wouldn’t be Christmas season without The Dark is Rising! What surprised me the most is how few I’ve apparently written that are actually Christmas-centric, when it’s such an important part of the series! (It might also be that I just don’t have them anymore, or didn’t post them to AO3, because I’ve been writing for this fandom a long time.)
This one was, as the author notes indicate, scribbled out quickly during Christmas Eve church, and fixed for posting afterward. I did go back more recently and do some edits. I didn’t live in Wales yet in 2002, so got a few little things wrong – mostly younger!Ash didn’t quite get the church/chapel divide, and had them all heading into Tywyn to the local Anglican church even though Owen is explicitly noted as going to chapel. The further problem is that by the time this takes place, the chapel in Tywyn was already turned into flats, though I think the one in Abergynolwyn (closer to Clwyd farm anyway) was still going. I realise these details are really not that important to most readers, and especially have no real bearing on the direction of a very short fic about accidentally coming out to your parents, but well, I live here.
It is very short – barely over 1k words – so I don’t want the intro to end up longer than the fic.
While Shepherds Watched (TDIR, Will/Bran)
Rated G
‘It was the first Christmas Eve of his lifetime that he had not spent with his family, noisy and bustling in the bright din of a two-storey farmhouse full of children and spouses and nieces and nephews and neighbours dropping by just to say hello, the smell of cinnamon and apples and pudding, the warmth of the fire interrupted by bursts of cold air when the door opened, the sound of six or seven Christmas carols all jangling together at once.’
It wouldn’t be Christmas season without The Dark is Rising! What surprised me the most is how few I’ve apparently written that are actually Christmas-centric, when it’s such an important part of the series! (It might also be that I just don’t have them anymore, or didn’t post them to AO3, because I’ve been writing for this fandom a long time.)
This one was, as the author notes indicate, scribbled out quickly during Christmas Eve church, and fixed for posting afterward. I did go back more recently and do some edits. I didn’t live in Wales yet in 2002, so got a few little things wrong – mostly younger!Ash didn’t quite get the church/chapel divide, and had them all heading into Tywyn to the local Anglican church even though Owen is explicitly noted as going to chapel. The further problem is that by the time this takes place, the chapel in Tywyn was already turned into flats, though I think the one in Abergynolwyn (closer to Clwyd farm anyway) was still going. I realise these details are really not that important to most readers, and especially have no real bearing on the direction of a very short fic about accidentally coming out to your parents, but well, I live here.
It is very short – barely over 1k words – so I don’t want the intro to end up longer than the fic.
While Shepherds Watched (TDIR, Will/Bran)
Rated G
‘It was the first Christmas Eve of his lifetime that he had not spent with his family, noisy and bustling in the bright din of a two-storey farmhouse full of children and spouses and nieces and nephews and neighbours dropping by just to say hello, the smell of cinnamon and apples and pudding, the warmth of the fire interrupted by bursts of cold air when the door opened, the sound of six or seven Christmas carols all jangling together at once.’
Song: While Shepherds Watched Their Flocks by Night
(I wanted the Welsh version but couldn't find a good one, so we went with Carols from Kings for choirboy Will.)
Fic rec: We Wish You a Logical Christmas by little_ogre (MDZS Star Trek AU, wangxian)
Rated M
What caught my attention first about this fic is that it's the JIang, not the Lan, who are Vulcans. Half-Vulcan WWX brings LWJ home during Christmas shore leave, and pon farr happens. It's excellent.
Back to Day 3 | Onward to Day 5
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embraceyourinnerdork Guess who's gonna try and use this blog?
I signed up for the Fannish 50 challenge at![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
goals_on_dw , so I will come up with presumably one fannish topic a week to post about. If anyone has any particular topics they'd like me to cover, feel free to comment!
I signed up for the Fannish 50 challenge at
goals_on_dw , so I will come up with presumably one fannish topic a week to post about. If anyone has any particular topics they'd like me to cover, feel free to comment!Tags:
overmoreOver the weekend I made a decision to switch to Linux Mint, since sooner or later, my laptop would probably force me to switch to windows 11, something I do not want to do due to the shitty AI and other useless stuff they'd push out on me. Official support for win 10 has ended, so at some point, Steam would stop supporting it too, which is one of the platforms I use for games, and that would make a problem for me. Not to mention the PC itself is on the older side (i got it in 2020 and not as a new one) so I'd be forced to buy another, and with the shit they're pulling on RAM now, I'd rather not get a new laptop with gb RAM while I already have that much here.
To not deal with window's shit any longer, I decided on Linux Mint, mainly because I've heard from people who use it that it's on the easier side when it comes to Linux operating systems. After a few days so far, I can say I am happy with my choice! Even if I'm not a that amazing with tech, I was able to get everything I needed without much of a fuss. I got Librewolf (my browser of choice) to work right away, I have everything I need for writing and steam works well as it can run on Linux, something that wasn't a case in the past from what I've heard. I do some times use Epic Games due to the free games they have, and I was able to find a work around as the store itself is not possible to run on Linux. The community of games really does care on making it easy to use it, even if the launcher is not a favourite one hahahah.
The only problem I'm still trying to solve is running my non-steam games that normally run on an .exe file, like Identity V and some pirated games. There are ways to do it, but I'm still figuring out, and last time I tried the other day the game did not work sadly. I should be able to get it to work sooner or later however, so that's important.
As everything was easy so far, I'd say Linux is not as scary as some people make it out to me. Mint is the friendliest one for beginners for sure, I'd say if you want to give up on windows this is a good option. I've searched only a few things and haven't had many major problems at this point in time. I will continue to monitor how things work, but so far, I'm happy with my choice to switch!
To not deal with window's shit any longer, I decided on Linux Mint, mainly because I've heard from people who use it that it's on the easier side when it comes to Linux operating systems. After a few days so far, I can say I am happy with my choice! Even if I'm not a that amazing with tech, I was able to get everything I needed without much of a fuss. I got Librewolf (my browser of choice) to work right away, I have everything I need for writing and steam works well as it can run on Linux, something that wasn't a case in the past from what I've heard. I do some times use Epic Games due to the free games they have, and I was able to find a work around as the store itself is not possible to run on Linux. The community of games really does care on making it easy to use it, even if the launcher is not a favourite one hahahah.
The only problem I'm still trying to solve is running my non-steam games that normally run on an .exe file, like Identity V and some pirated games. There are ways to do it, but I'm still figuring out, and last time I tried the other day the game did not work sadly. I should be able to get it to work sooner or later however, so that's important.
As everything was easy so far, I'd say Linux is not as scary as some people make it out to me. Mint is the friendliest one for beginners for sure, I'd say if you want to give up on windows this is a good option. I've searched only a few things and haven't had many major problems at this point in time. I will continue to monitor how things work, but so far, I'm happy with my choice to switch!
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✦ genshin impact | lyney/freminet | you will always be my favorite form of loving
Dec. 16th, 2025 11:32 amvalzhangHello. I started this day quite happy, had a nice breakfast, went to the gym and it wasn't too crowded. I read in the library for a bit while eating chocolate biscuits and it was nice.
Then I biked to the public library where I had planned to borrow These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever... only to find it was CLOSED!!! This is the worst thing to happen to me. I nearly cried when I saw ヽ(*。>Д<)o゜ I knew the library was going to be closed until 2029 because its being renovated from the ground up, and I knew the alternative location would only open on January 19th, but I didn't think the main one would close so soon.
Maybe it's my fault for not checking in detail, but I had planned to read a lot of different books over the winter break. Now all my plans are ruined. I'll either have to waste money buying from a bookstore or read from a free online PDF. But I despise reading on a screen unless it's a reread, I find it so difficult and awful.
So I'm at a dilemma here. Sigh. I still have a few books that could tide me over but I really wanted to read TVD. I'm going to try to search for some other library locations and see if I can find it there. Hopefully I have some luck.
Other than that disaster, today was okay I suppose. Gonna finish up Kafka and write a post on my thoughts, which I have a lot of, as usual.
Then I biked to the public library where I had planned to borrow These Violent Delights by Micah Nemerever... only to find it was CLOSED!!! This is the worst thing to happen to me. I nearly cried when I saw ヽ(*。>Д<)o゜ I knew the library was going to be closed until 2029 because its being renovated from the ground up, and I knew the alternative location would only open on January 19th, but I didn't think the main one would close so soon.
Maybe it's my fault for not checking in detail, but I had planned to read a lot of different books over the winter break. Now all my plans are ruined. I'll either have to waste money buying from a bookstore or read from a free online PDF. But I despise reading on a screen unless it's a reread, I find it so difficult and awful.
So I'm at a dilemma here. Sigh. I still have a few books that could tide me over but I really wanted to read TVD. I'm going to try to search for some other library locations and see if I can find it there. Hopefully I have some luck.
Other than that disaster, today was okay I suppose. Gonna finish up Kafka and write a post on my thoughts, which I have a lot of, as usual.
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luvcrumbs hi, i'm valentine!
21 years old being (any pronouns). i speak spanish and english !
casual artist and writer, though i only post fandom related pieces online.
anxious, autistic and a mess. big music, books and movies nerd !
i'm a extremely amateur writer, who just started this year, and english is not my first language so what i write might not be as good... but i'm here to learn! please be mindful of it if you read any of my works.
in a few fandoms and hugeee multishipper, but these ones are my main ones currently:
fandoms: identity v, jojo's bizarre adventure, homestuck, chainsaw man + more
ships: luchieli (idv), joscarl (idv), viotracy (idv), gyjo (jjba), vrisrezi (hs), akiangel (csm), ineffable husbands (good omens), gaalee (naruto), zutara (atla)
used to be into personality studies... i'm a infj 2w3 269 phlegmatic-sanguine RLUAI
nice to meet you <3
21 years old being (any pronouns). i speak spanish and english !
casual artist and writer, though i only post fandom related pieces online.
anxious, autistic and a mess. big music, books and movies nerd !
i'm a extremely amateur writer, who just started this year, and english is not my first language so what i write might not be as good... but i'm here to learn! please be mindful of it if you read any of my works.
in a few fandoms and hugeee multishipper, but these ones are my main ones currently:
fandoms: identity v, jojo's bizarre adventure, homestuck, chainsaw man + more
ships: luchieli (idv), joscarl (idv), viotracy (idv), gyjo (jjba), vrisrezi (hs), akiangel (csm), ineffable husbands (good omens), gaalee (naruto), zutara (atla)
used to be into personality studies... i'm a infj 2w3 269 phlegmatic-sanguine RLUAI
nice to meet you <3
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ashkittySo the many times I wrote for the K/S Advent Calendar mean there are more Star Trek fics on this list than anything else. This was 2010’s offering, in which Spock convinces Jim to go home to Iowa and see his family for Christmas. We do spend a bit of time grappling with nu!Trek Jim’s troubled childhood, but it’s still ultimately a happy story about growing up, and coming home.
Delusions of our Childhood Days (Star Trek, Kirk/Spock)
‘He glanced over at Spock. “Sick of hearing this shit yet? Ready to tell me it’s illogical?”
“Jim,” Spock answered patiently, “I agreed to accompany you on this outing. I am aware I influenced you in choosing to pursue it in the first place for the sole purpose of confronting the emotional upheaval of your past. Since then I have partaken of an intoxicating substance and am sitting with you, in subzero temperatures, on the roof. No part of this scenario is the least bit logical.”
Jim reached for Spock’s hand, holding it between his own, still gazing off toward the trees. “But you’re here.”’
A song to go with it: Thunder Road (not a Christmas song, but relevant to the story)
And a fic rec:The Cold Days of Winter (Eight Days of Luke, David/Luke) by Daegaer
Rated G
So it's probably important to know the canon for this one (and the more about Norse mythology the better) but if you do it's exquisite. There are moments - David's hesitation to light a match, not because he's afraid Luke will appear but because he's afraid he won't, and he'll have to let go of the idea that it was ever more than his imagination. Luke's fierce protectiveness is lovely, but there's a very definite shudder of dark things to come at the end. A good fic for a cold night!
Back to Day 2 | On to Day 4
Delusions of our Childhood Days (Star Trek, Kirk/Spock)
‘He glanced over at Spock. “Sick of hearing this shit yet? Ready to tell me it’s illogical?”
“Jim,” Spock answered patiently, “I agreed to accompany you on this outing. I am aware I influenced you in choosing to pursue it in the first place for the sole purpose of confronting the emotional upheaval of your past. Since then I have partaken of an intoxicating substance and am sitting with you, in subzero temperatures, on the roof. No part of this scenario is the least bit logical.”
Jim reached for Spock’s hand, holding it between his own, still gazing off toward the trees. “But you’re here.”’
A song to go with it: Thunder Road (not a Christmas song, but relevant to the story)
And a fic rec:The Cold Days of Winter (Eight Days of Luke, David/Luke) by Daegaer
Rated G
So it's probably important to know the canon for this one (and the more about Norse mythology the better) but if you do it's exquisite. There are moments - David's hesitation to light a match, not because he's afraid Luke will appear but because he's afraid he won't, and he'll have to let go of the idea that it was ever more than his imagination. Luke's fierce protectiveness is lovely, but there's a very definite shudder of dark things to come at the end. A good fic for a cold night!
Back to Day 2 | On to Day 4
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wandering_foxMy Book, The Sixth Hour is part of the Smashwords 2025 End of Year Sale! It's super cheap there right now: 99 cents from now until January 1st! Not the worst way to spend a dollar: reading a fun little story written with love. You can learn more about the book at the link above, or search for more books on sale at Smashwords.
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visualjyushiAlthough I haven't worked on fics as much as I wanted to this year, I surprisingly have written a lot? I participated in getyourwordsout for the first time, and after just updating my tracker sheet, I apparently have gotten through 102/120 days for my habit pledge so far. That may not seem like much to some people, but I've found that being a student really prevents me from having the energy to be creative. I didn't expect to write for even half as many days as my pledge to be honest. But somehow, I'll probably end up at least around the 90% mark of my goal by the end of 2025! It's not possible to make the 120 days anymore now that I've missed so many days, but I can't be upset about the outcome.
getyourwordsout for the first time, and after just updating my tracker sheet, I apparently have gotten through 102/120 days for my habit pledge so far. That may not seem like much to some people, but I've found that being a student really prevents me from having the energy to be creative. I didn't expect to write for even half as many days as my pledge to be honest. But somehow, I'll probably end up at least around the 90% mark of my goal by the end of 2025! It's not possible to make the 120 days anymore now that I've missed so many days, but I can't be upset about the outcome. 
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valzhangHi, if you're reading this you might be creating for me for the Rare Femslash Exchange. Thank you so much! I've put my general likes and DNWs on the sign-up on Ao3, but if you want more specific ideas on what to write, here it is. You don't have to adhere to it super closely though, as long as it matches up with my ships and doesn't have my DNWs I'll be super happy and appreciative.
General likes: Angst, toxic/unhealthy relationships, codependency, obsession, hurt/comfort, fluff, getting together, Canon Divergence AUs, Fantasy AUs, character studies, mutual pining, yearning please I LOVE yearning
General DNWs: Kid fics, pregnancy, pure wholesome fluff with no substance, drugs or drugging, Coffee Shop AUs, anything surrounding marriage, making the ship incest, making the ship child/adult, character bashing, MCD with the main ship
Chainsaw Man (Makima/Quanxi)
I usually like this ship one-sided with Quanxi pining after Makima, doesn't matter if it's real love or Makima manipulating her or a mix of both. But I also like if you want to make it mutual with Makima seeing her as amusing or a good pet or something like that, as long as she still feels like Makima. It's up to you.
Maybe the plot could be them meeting for the first time, or aversely them meeting after having known each other for a long time during the International Assassins arc. Or it could be Makima hiring Quanxi for a mission? Could be anything, I don't care too much about the plot itself as long as I get to see these two being fucked up.
The time setting can be during any period of Chainsaw Man, it can be pre-canon or during Part 1 or some other ambiguous time is fine. I would love to see Makima being evil and teasing Quanxi knowing Quanxi has feelings for her. AUs are okay as well.
I'm okay with Quanxi's fiend girlfriends being brought up or making appearances, but I don't want them to play a big role in the story please.
Likes: Manipulation (from Makima), power imbalance, toxicity, pining (from Quanxi)
DNWs: OOC, a healthy functioning relationship
Hazbin Hotel
Royalvelvette: I like the concept of obsession with these two. Charlie being obsessed with Velvette, or the other way around, or mutual obssesion, I'm down with whatever! It doesn't have to be that though, just a suggestion.
Maybe them having to work together because it would benefit both the Hotel and Voxtek? Charlie trying to be patient and nice while Velvette degrades her is so good. Maybe she even likes it a little. Or her trying to be angry at Vel when Vel does something evil but she keeps getting distracted by how beautiful she is and how attracted to her she is.
Charlie cheating on Vaggie would be good too, but she has to feel super duper uber guilty about it.
Charlute/Emilute/Charemilute: My tastes for these three ships are mostly the same, I just want to see their ideals clash. With Charlute I could see Charlie being angry about Lute trying to kill Vaggie. I think Emily would be slightly more patient and kind with Lute compared to Charlie, who might anger quicker.
I could see Lute being surprised when Emily shows her kindness even when they disagree, like refusing to use force on Lute (as a Seraphim I imagine she's more powerful than Lute). She hates both Charlie and Emily's naivete. Or maybe Charlie and Lute fighting when Lute tries to make good on her promise to kill Vaggie?
Like I said, I'm down for everything, I would just love to see where you take these characters.
Likes: Canon setting, canon-divergence AUs, enemies to lovers, enemies AND lovers, forced proximity, forcibly dragging Lute into becoming a better person, heteronormativity/internalised homophobia (with Velvette and Lute)
DNWs: Aside from general DNWs, I'm fine with anything
Persona 5 (Sumire/Futaba)
While NSFW for the other two fandoms is fine, I would prefer to not get sexual content for this one!
My tastes so far have been not-very-wholesome I admit, but I like fluffier and cuter stuff for this fandom. Of course if you want to add some more unhealthy dynamics here I'm not opposed to that either, so you can really take it either way.
A getting-together story would be nice for these two, whether it's post-canon or during the events of the game. Maybe Sumire the athlete trying to teach Futaba how to work out after so long holed up in her room, or Futaba sharing her interests with Sumire. Some hurt/comfort with their trauma would be cool too.
For an angstier take, I could also see Sumire pining after Joker and being attracted to Futaba because Futaba is Joker's younger sister figure and she sees Joker in her. Then by the end she realises she really likes Futaba as herself, not just a Joker "replacement". I also like Shuake so maybe Futaba having negative feelings about her older brother being in love with her mother's killer would be juicy, especially with Sumire who is close to both Joker and Akechi. Honestly any interactions with these two about anything would be good.
AUs are okay too.
Likes: Metaverse adventures, partnership/reliance on one another, emotional hurt/comfort, introspection on mental illness, Sumire being a little fucked up as a result of her trauma (well this goes for both of them but Sumire especially), outsider POV
DNWs: Joker and Akechi with anyone except each other (if they do show up), explicit sexual content between the main ship (suggestive is okay), unhappy/bad ending
NSFW
If you want to write NSFW for CSM or Hazbin, here are my likes and dislikes for that. I also have set preferences when it comes to positions/dynamics so please respect that haha ˋ( ° ▽、° )
Likes: Size difference, overstimulation, sex pollen/aphrodisiacs, intercrural, teasing, edging, rough sex, painplay, D/S dynamics, virginity kink, begging, biting, Charlie lowkey being a pervert, Quanxi worshipping Makima
DNWs: Shibari, noncon, emeto, hypnosis, piss/watersports, scat, vore, feederism, underage
Preferences:
Makima: Bottom, dom
Quanxi: Top, sub
Charlie: Top, switch
Emily: Vers, switch
Lute: Bottom, sub
Velvette: Bottom, switch
And that concludes my dear creator letter! I hope it isn't too long and picky. I'm open to a lot of things, so as long as it's according to my DNWs, I'll be happy! Even if it's completely different from any ideas I suggested. Thank you! <3
General likes: Angst, toxic/unhealthy relationships, codependency, obsession, hurt/comfort, fluff, getting together, Canon Divergence AUs, Fantasy AUs, character studies, mutual pining, yearning please I LOVE yearning
General DNWs: Kid fics, pregnancy, pure wholesome fluff with no substance, drugs or drugging, Coffee Shop AUs, anything surrounding marriage, making the ship incest, making the ship child/adult, character bashing, MCD with the main ship
Chainsaw Man (Makima/Quanxi)
I usually like this ship one-sided with Quanxi pining after Makima, doesn't matter if it's real love or Makima manipulating her or a mix of both. But I also like if you want to make it mutual with Makima seeing her as amusing or a good pet or something like that, as long as she still feels like Makima. It's up to you.
Maybe the plot could be them meeting for the first time, or aversely them meeting after having known each other for a long time during the International Assassins arc. Or it could be Makima hiring Quanxi for a mission? Could be anything, I don't care too much about the plot itself as long as I get to see these two being fucked up.
The time setting can be during any period of Chainsaw Man, it can be pre-canon or during Part 1 or some other ambiguous time is fine. I would love to see Makima being evil and teasing Quanxi knowing Quanxi has feelings for her. AUs are okay as well.
I'm okay with Quanxi's fiend girlfriends being brought up or making appearances, but I don't want them to play a big role in the story please.
Likes: Manipulation (from Makima), power imbalance, toxicity, pining (from Quanxi)
DNWs: OOC, a healthy functioning relationship
Hazbin Hotel
Royalvelvette: I like the concept of obsession with these two. Charlie being obsessed with Velvette, or the other way around, or mutual obssesion, I'm down with whatever! It doesn't have to be that though, just a suggestion.
Maybe them having to work together because it would benefit both the Hotel and Voxtek? Charlie trying to be patient and nice while Velvette degrades her is so good. Maybe she even likes it a little. Or her trying to be angry at Vel when Vel does something evil but she keeps getting distracted by how beautiful she is and how attracted to her she is.
Charlie cheating on Vaggie would be good too, but she has to feel super duper uber guilty about it.
Charlute/Emilute/Charemilute: My tastes for these three ships are mostly the same, I just want to see their ideals clash. With Charlute I could see Charlie being angry about Lute trying to kill Vaggie. I think Emily would be slightly more patient and kind with Lute compared to Charlie, who might anger quicker.
I could see Lute being surprised when Emily shows her kindness even when they disagree, like refusing to use force on Lute (as a Seraphim I imagine she's more powerful than Lute). She hates both Charlie and Emily's naivete. Or maybe Charlie and Lute fighting when Lute tries to make good on her promise to kill Vaggie?
Like I said, I'm down for everything, I would just love to see where you take these characters.
Likes: Canon setting, canon-divergence AUs, enemies to lovers, enemies AND lovers, forced proximity, forcibly dragging Lute into becoming a better person, heteronormativity/internalised homophobia (with Velvette and Lute)
DNWs: Aside from general DNWs, I'm fine with anything
Persona 5 (Sumire/Futaba)
While NSFW for the other two fandoms is fine, I would prefer to not get sexual content for this one!
My tastes so far have been not-very-wholesome I admit, but I like fluffier and cuter stuff for this fandom. Of course if you want to add some more unhealthy dynamics here I'm not opposed to that either, so you can really take it either way.
A getting-together story would be nice for these two, whether it's post-canon or during the events of the game. Maybe Sumire the athlete trying to teach Futaba how to work out after so long holed up in her room, or Futaba sharing her interests with Sumire. Some hurt/comfort with their trauma would be cool too.
For an angstier take, I could also see Sumire pining after Joker and being attracted to Futaba because Futaba is Joker's younger sister figure and she sees Joker in her. Then by the end she realises she really likes Futaba as herself, not just a Joker "replacement". I also like Shuake so maybe Futaba having negative feelings about her older brother being in love with her mother's killer would be juicy, especially with Sumire who is close to both Joker and Akechi. Honestly any interactions with these two about anything would be good.
AUs are okay too.
Likes: Metaverse adventures, partnership/reliance on one another, emotional hurt/comfort, introspection on mental illness, Sumire being a little fucked up as a result of her trauma (well this goes for both of them but Sumire especially), outsider POV
DNWs: Joker and Akechi with anyone except each other (if they do show up), explicit sexual content between the main ship (suggestive is okay), unhappy/bad ending
NSFW
If you want to write NSFW for CSM or Hazbin, here are my likes and dislikes for that. I also have set preferences when it comes to positions/dynamics so please respect that haha ˋ( ° ▽、° )
Likes: Size difference, overstimulation, sex pollen/aphrodisiacs, intercrural, teasing, edging, rough sex, painplay, D/S dynamics, virginity kink, begging, biting, Charlie lowkey being a pervert, Quanxi worshipping Makima
DNWs: Shibari, noncon, emeto, hypnosis, piss/watersports, scat, vore, feederism, underage
Preferences:
Makima: Bottom, dom
Quanxi: Top, sub
Charlie: Top, switch
Emily: Vers, switch
Lute: Bottom, sub
Velvette: Bottom, switch
And that concludes my dear creator letter! I hope it isn't too long and picky. I'm open to a lot of things, so as long as it's according to my DNWs, I'll be happy! Even if it's completely different from any ideas I suggested. Thank you! <3
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vriddyI'm having a really happy fandom time at the moment. It's the whole virtuous cycle of being in sync with a couple of fellow gremlins fans who are into the same thing I am, in similar ways, where we cheer for canon, we cheer for our shared interpretation, and we cheer and enable each other.
That means at the moment, when I'm writing, I often have one reader's specific reactions in mind and it is glorious. I don't really need more, or it helps me not count on it at least. I have a good chance of connecting with a fellow fan, brain-to-brain, heart-to-heart and that is JOYFUL!
So I wrote last night's drabble like that, which was also fun because I want to write more shorter things, too. More yeeting into the void. Sometimes being so slow gnaws a bit at my confidence, when it takes SO! DAMN! LONG! to finish anything haha, and then it's hard not to build up expectations.
Having said that I returned to editing my long poly Kaijuu No. 8 fic this morning, which I'm having such a grand time with :D I knew the first half didn't work well and wasn't sure how to fix it originally, thought I might have to go the whole enchilida and reverse-outline it. Anchoringhealed me fixed it, though! :D And yesterday I reached the turning point scene in the middle, which STILL makes me laugh out loud after *checks spreadsheet* 3 months since I wrote it, and I'm still cackling. This is the scene from which I found my feet so I've been cooing and giggling and awww-ing in my editing this morning XD
Incidentally, I think this is one of my failures with the cursed witch, and many of my original projects. I tend to go in serious mode, when I believe that integrating humour in stories is a strength of mine. There's a couple of lighthearted and funny moments in the witch story, but I didn't leave a lot of space for that.
But also my main enabling friend went 👀👀👀 at me about the kn8 turning point scene yesterday so I got to share it early, and they laughed too, and I'm happy. I can write stories and have fun doing it, I can fix most/many problems in my writing once I noticed them, I can share with at least one or two people who appreciate whatever it is I'm trying to do, at least some of the time.
Wishing you all an amazing week!!!!!!!!!
That means at the moment, when I'm writing, I often have one reader's specific reactions in mind and it is glorious. I don't really need more, or it helps me not count on it at least. I have a good chance of connecting with a fellow fan, brain-to-brain, heart-to-heart and that is JOYFUL!
So I wrote last night's drabble like that, which was also fun because I want to write more shorter things, too. More yeeting into the void. Sometimes being so slow gnaws a bit at my confidence, when it takes SO! DAMN! LONG! to finish anything haha, and then it's hard not to build up expectations.
Having said that I returned to editing my long poly Kaijuu No. 8 fic this morning, which I'm having such a grand time with :D I knew the first half didn't work well and wasn't sure how to fix it originally, thought I might have to go the whole enchilida and reverse-outline it. Anchoring
Incidentally, I think this is one of my failures with the cursed witch, and many of my original projects. I tend to go in serious mode, when I believe that integrating humour in stories is a strength of mine. There's a couple of lighthearted and funny moments in the witch story, but I didn't leave a lot of space for that.
But also my main enabling friend went 👀👀👀 at me about the kn8 turning point scene yesterday so I got to share it early, and they laughed too, and I'm happy. I can write stories and have fun doing it, I can fix most/many problems in my writing once I noticed them, I can share with at least one or two people who appreciate whatever it is I'm trying to do, at least some of the time.
Wishing you all an amazing week!!!!!!!!!
ashkittyI've been awake for just over 23 hours so going to dive right in here.
This 2015 Yuletide fic features THREE SEPARATE Christmases, so it’s like a free gift with purchase! Or something. Connie Willis’ Oxford Time Travel Series always makes me think of Christmas, partly because the first one I read was Doomsday Book (which happens over Christmas in several time periods) and second because I wrote Yuletide fics for it three years in a row.
If you don’t know it, you should check it out – it’s not always an easy read, and there are some weird little linguistic catches that can grate (the English people in these books talk like an American imagines English people in the 1920s might have spoken). I found Blackout/All Clear a frustrating slog until suddenly I didn’t, because somehow the experience of going through all that repeatedly with the characters made sense.
Anyway, if you do know it, then this fic follows Colin through the years between Doomsday Book and post-All Clear, but is much shorter than any of those and will not take so much dedication to read.
A Carol of Dreaming Spires (Oxford Time Travel, Colin Templar/Polly Churchill)
‘It was tradition, by now: Dunworthy in his armchair, Badri folded onto one end of the faded sofa and Kivrin curled against him. Colin stretched out on the floor in front of the blocked-off fireplace. The only new addition this year was Polly, perched on the floor with a tartan blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Colin snuck looks at her while pretending to read the book Kivrin had given him.’
A song to go with it: The Atheist Christmas Carol
And a fic rec: Yippee Ki Yay, Father Christmas (Everwood, Bright & Ephram) by Cyren2132
Have you seen Everwood? One of the best shows the CW decided not to keep; the premise is so cheesy but the characters were so, so good. (And Bright is Chris Pratt at his young, pre-being-a-super-Republican-for-some-reason best.) Anyway this is the one where Bright and Ephram get stranded in a roadside motel on Christmas Eve.
Back to Day 1 | On to Day 3
This 2015 Yuletide fic features THREE SEPARATE Christmases, so it’s like a free gift with purchase! Or something. Connie Willis’ Oxford Time Travel Series always makes me think of Christmas, partly because the first one I read was Doomsday Book (which happens over Christmas in several time periods) and second because I wrote Yuletide fics for it three years in a row.
If you don’t know it, you should check it out – it’s not always an easy read, and there are some weird little linguistic catches that can grate (the English people in these books talk like an American imagines English people in the 1920s might have spoken). I found Blackout/All Clear a frustrating slog until suddenly I didn’t, because somehow the experience of going through all that repeatedly with the characters made sense.
Anyway, if you do know it, then this fic follows Colin through the years between Doomsday Book and post-All Clear, but is much shorter than any of those and will not take so much dedication to read.
A Carol of Dreaming Spires (Oxford Time Travel, Colin Templar/Polly Churchill)
‘It was tradition, by now: Dunworthy in his armchair, Badri folded onto one end of the faded sofa and Kivrin curled against him. Colin stretched out on the floor in front of the blocked-off fireplace. The only new addition this year was Polly, perched on the floor with a tartan blanket wrapped around her shoulders. Colin snuck looks at her while pretending to read the book Kivrin had given him.’
A song to go with it: The Atheist Christmas Carol
And a fic rec: Yippee Ki Yay, Father Christmas (Everwood, Bright & Ephram) by Cyren2132
Have you seen Everwood? One of the best shows the CW decided not to keep; the premise is so cheesy but the characters were so, so good. (And Bright is Chris Pratt at his young, pre-being-a-super-Republican-for-some-reason best.) Anyway this is the one where Bright and Ephram get stranded in a roadside motel on Christmas Eve.
Back to Day 1 | On to Day 3
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